EXAMS ARE OVER FINALLY!

CAN'T CONTAIN MY EXCITEMENT NOW THAT EXAMS ARE OVER, FINALLY AFTER A SUPER LOOOONG WAIT OF 3 WEEKS OF EXAMS! 7 PAPERS, AND NOW THAT ITS OVER, I DONT KNOW HOW TO FEEL. I FEEL FREE, FREEDOM! I LOVE THIS FEELING. ITS LIKE I NEVER FEEL LIKE THIS BEFORE, NOT EVEN AFTER A'S (OR SO I REMEMBERED) I JUST FEEL FREE NOW.. FREEEEE..

tell you what, seriously i dont exagerrate it! i really feel like that now. well, and apparently I MANAGED TO KEEP MY EXAM RESOLUTION! THAT IS NO L4D UNTIL EXAM ENDS! haha, i really didn't touch any of L4D. and you know what, i played it straight away after i reach my room after the last paper. just awhile, 15 mins. and i really feel damn satisfied.

and MOST IMPORTANTLY, i wanna say a big thank you for everyone who have supported me through this exam! all the 'goodluck', 'jiayous' and 'all the bests', well, you may think its a small thing but it is what push me through the loooong exam period. so once again, thankssssss people (: ooo, and thanks to jen2! for the exam present! which is supposed to motivate me? (so random but THANKS ALOTTT!) haha, its a tie with a microphone on it :D cute.

OOOHH I LOVE LIFE. and this post will be all about what i do during exams and stuffs, if youre bored just skip. hehe, well, maybe for a start, i shall put down what have i accomplished during this exam time. (and thats how it goes every exam!)

TV Series
1. The Big Bang Theory season 1 and 2
2. How I Met Your Mother season 1 - 4

Gaming
1. 1 Season of PES 2009 (Become a legend)
2. Half Life 2 : Chapter 1-7

AND thats it. well, 4 seasons of how i met your mother is really time consuming :p haha, but studying without refreshing is like hell, and thats when all the fun in the midst of exam comes. last semester exams was totally hooked on house if im not wrong. 4 seasons owned :D

and now i shall recap the activities and mugging plan that i did during the exam week. (MUGGING is everyday of course, so dont ask :D)
1st week! (really cant remember)
monday: mug CS100
tuesday: CS100 paper(aim A-), mugged EE2006
wednesday: mugged EE2003
thursday: mugged FE1005
friday: mugged EE2004 at NBS reading room with kong, yt, oe
saturday: mugged EE2001 at NBS reading room with kong, yt, oe
sunday: mugged EE2003, skipped church! :X

2nd week!
monday: EE2003 paper!(aim A-), mugged FE1005 at NBS reading room with kong, yt, oe
tuesday: FE1005 paper! (aim A-), oe and yt finished their exam, we went JP to celebrate! (:
wednesday: mugged EE2004, went to accompany geraldine for SPMS interview.
thursday: EE2004 paper!(aim A), GAMING NIGHT until 7am in the morning. i watched and played PES while the rest are L4Ding! damn.
friday: woke up at 9pm! went to JP for dinner with oe and yt. mugged EE2006
saturday: went to church! mugged EE2008
sunday: oe flew back to indo, mugged EE2006

3rd week! monday: EE2006 paper! (aim A), mugged EE2008
tuesday: EE2008 paper! (aim A-), mugged EE2001
wednesday: EE2001 paper! (aim B!), PLAYED L4D for the 1st time! AND BLOGGING NOW. HAHAHAHA.

what a hectic and dull 3 weeks. i hope my life will start again soon!

people say, if theres lemon, make lemonade! haha, instead of correcting my body clock, i used it to my advantage! my sleeping time was super weird. especially on the last week. woke up everyday around 7pm, watch movie, play and slack until 10pm, STUDY HARD until 5am, and on the dot, 5am, sleep till 7am, and go for paper till 11pm, go back, watch a show, and sleep till 7pm again. the mind is as fresh as possible in the morning after a 2 hr power nap, maybe i shall make it my permanent exam plan!

ahh okay, now what should i do? (damn that kong and yiting i think they are asleep now i cant LAN with them yet. i shall watch movie and play other games then. wait. damn. i realise if my life after exam is only movies and games. what a no life! damn.. haaha, outing soon please people! (: (: ahh, what else.. dates! :D well first 10 customers free! (no, no, really joking) hahahah..

ahhhh, flopped my last paper though, thats why a B grade will be enough. I JUST HOPE THAT I DONT DAPAO THAT SUBJECT! killer paper. and one of my weakest subject damn. oh so if i can achieve all my aim, lets see, my GPA this sem will be... 4.47! well, below target, but yeah i guess its alright. ALRIGHT (:

oh about the random tags on my tagboard. damn it. when i see wenhao's blog got spammed, i thot, "haha, they wont be able to find my tagboard anyway, and guess what? 3 spams already! dammit. ahh, its alright alright.

oh and take care k! SWINE FLU!!! haha, and anyway i found a funny picture about the swine flu.

ok i shall end this long and useless post. im happy.

the start of the wait.

my body clock is finally back to normal..... if im staying in israel that is. well, seems like GMT +8 is not my timezone already. it has been improving lately though, but sleeping time stays constant around 4-6am, the waking up time have the largest standard deviation. perhaps, 7am-5pm? i had this idea though, why not i change all my clock to the new zealand time? then by default, sleeping at 5am means sleeping at 12pm!

this is the new zealand time, but i think again, maybe not during the exam period. ill miss all my papers.

nonsense stops there. exams has already begun and my first paper was today, CS100, managable yet theres no comparative advantage against anyone, everyone has the same chance to score well and thats why im scared about the result. but whats done is done, next week will be packed with 3 exams and next next week another 3. i still haven't figure out how to finish studying all those (yet i managed to take some time to watch movie, blog, etc.) that sounds bad, ok maybe im exaggerating. well, my desktop has a countdown already, and i think my blog should have one too! so here it is! (its damn ugly i cant find a more normal one)

back to some nonsensical stuff, was mugging EE2003 just now and found this doodles on one of the pages. haha, this one is quite funny i got no idea what made me draw that last time. you know that doodling subject is an unconcious thought based on your mood/feeling. yeah.. imagine..

and then on my way back to my room i saw a pretty and quite big moth outside kong's room, decided to take a shot but blame my current height (which most likely my permanent height) or my digital phone camera (i want a DSLR seriously), the shot isnt that nice, so whatever photoshop give me, i shall put here (:

well, not here for long, going back to mugging (of course after an episode of the big bang theory), hopefully no more posts till the end of exam cos as you know its gonna be mundane and boring posts.)

edit: was finding a nicer countdown and i thought i had put some countdowns last time. well, reading archives is funny yet hurtful at times. but it was fun indeed (:

Schrodinger's cat

"in 1935, Erwin Schrodinger, in an attempt to explain the Copenhagen interpretation of quantum physics, he proposed an experiment where a cat is placed in a box with a sealed vial of poison that will break open in the random time. Since no one knows when or if the poison has been released until the box is opened, during that period of time the cat can be thought of as both alive and dead."

just like schrodinger's cat, your potential relationship can be thought of as both good and bad. It is only by opening the box that you'll find out which it is.

that was sheldon's relationship advice for penny.

But think about it, it really applies to many of our everyday problems, doesn't it?

anyway thats one of the episode of the TV series im currently following right now, yes, The Big Bang Theory! (: haha, yes apparently got yt and kong hooked onto it also. well, as planned a new series every exam! :p haha but this time not as bad as house series during semester 1. since theres only 2 seasons of it currently!

the story goes about a group of nerdy geek and their bimbo neighbour. funny, romantic and inspirational stories about their everyday life which never fail to make you laugh. well, i will recommend this series to you all! anyway its a short series, only about 20mins per episode and theres only 2 seasons now. go watch! (ask me for it if you cant find.)

and anyway, had a series of crazy online lectures today, nonstop watching boring videos, and i found a way not to sleep while watching it. hehe, i did some housekeeping of my old files from my burned dvds and transferring them to my 1TB harddrive (which only has 500gb left now). hehe, found some old pictures and memories from the past (:.

                                   reminiscing the past (: and how lucky i was (:

clock or no clock?

Seems like the whole planning/strategy to repair my body clock fail miserably.

Sunday, i thot i was succesfull because i slept at 12am! (with the fact that i din sleep at all on saturday) and i woke up at 8am on monday morning. wow isnt that the normal sleeping time for normal people. (: hehe.

the problem started on monday. despite the 8 hours good night sleep, i still feel very sleepy after my lesson ended at 1130am, apparently took a short nap which turns out not to be so short and went ahead to skip my afternoon lesson only to be awaken at 400pm for my last lecture. it sounds quite wrong already. then because of the afternoon (or maybe as translated by my body) night sleep from 12-4, i cant sleep at night, finding myself asleep again at around 7am -.-

Tuesday, the problem isnt any better, despite sleeping at 7am, i managed to wake up at 8am (to me this really sound like an afternoon nap), after 1 hr of lesson came back to my room, thinking im not so sleepy, but after 1 hour of movie i fell asleep without planning and only woke up at 430pm. (remembered the exact timing because yt also just woke up). well, thats enough of sleep, so went can A for mugging (and watching movie) till around 2-3am and went back to, watch movie awhile then sleep at 5am! (in 2 days i managed to revert to the bat sleeping hour AGAIN)

and today, WEDNESDAY, was another weird one. i woke up at 8am of course for my lesson, came back at around 12pm and waken yt up for swimming and apparently i collapsed on my bed without knowing again. apparently quite deep in sleep because wenhao came into the room also i din notice. 130pm kena waken up for swimming, and im feeling really tired. (just like when normal people sleep 1 hr at night then got waken up you will feel this kind of tiredness) haha. finish swimming, went for 430 lecture, came back for an episode of house and big bang theory and finding myself damn tired at 10pm, went to take a short nap, until NOW! yeah, 1am awake and planning to mug (because havent mug at all today) and the sleeping time today is neither here nor there.

now, looking there are 2 possibilities,
1. the body clock is spoilt, its day-night reversed
2. there is simply no more clock

ahh, on another issue, i read the news this morning and apparently i read this piece of article because it catches my attention with the word "house" and "kutner". spoiler alert! click here for the news

The 31-year-old actor, who made his mark as the pot-smoking Kumar in the "Harold and Kumar" feature film comedies, will become associate director in the White House office of public liaison, Entertainment Weekly reported on Monday.

For the past two seasons, Penn played Dr. Lawrence Kuttner on Fox's medical-mystery drama "House." His character exited the show in a violent fashion on Monday's episode by committing suicide for no apparent reason.

Penn told Entertainment Weekly that he loved working on "House," but had always been a bit of a political junkie, inspired in part by his grandparents, who marched with Mahatma Gandhi in the Indian independence movement.

He campaigned for U.S. President Barack Obama, expressed interest in working for his administration, and got a job offer a few months ago. In his new role -- for which he will take a big pay cut -- he will "do outreach" with the American public and with different organizations.

"They're basically the front door of the White House. They take out all of the red tape that falls between the general public and the White House," he said of his new colleagues.

Penn, one of the few Indian-American actors to make it big in Hollywood, said he still has a passion for acting, but won't be appearing on screen for the foreseeable future.

at least i tell you all its a spoiler news! Imagine i was looking forward for the house latest episode that im gonna watch later in the evening and finding myself reading spoiler on an official NEWS? irritating bastard. spoil the whole movie. i wanna complain to the editor to just sack whoever the writer is for not even knowing the 'spoiler' etiquette.

another unrelated story, during the 10pm-1am which happened just now, i dreamt of a weird dream. found myself back in NJC for the new batch orientation and apparently was on stage performing some weird thing with the new kids o.o after that went out of the hall to the mugging benches and saw the PA people that i havent seen for ages, i still remember clearly the faces in the dream there was elaine, jen, shihui, jialin and cass (and weirdly got one of my primary school friend which i got no idea why she was there). they were studying for A levels (?weird?) but talking about cores and electives (?even weirder?) well weird dreams are just weird. dont care abt them.

reverse insomnia

as planned, i haven't have any sleep (or nap) on the last more or less 30 hours. finally the feeling came back! the feeling of sleepy-ness, ive been missing it for quite some time (altho is good for lessons). yeah, and as planned i will sleep around 12 today. (now is time for some movie action). haha, IM CURRENTLY in a state where i can even fall asleep when typing this :P.

had some good tennis this morning, 3 hours of tennis! hah, getting more and more hooked to this new sport and am very looking forward for next sunday for the next session :D hehe, cant wait for holidays cos itll be fun filled with sports and other fun activities :D

talking about holidays, exams are around the corner, i havent even start revising. havent even catch up with my work. damn, one more week, i can do it! go myself! haha, anyway just wanted to post a photo of a PRIVATE tutorial class where there was only me and my tutor, he was so emo theres only ONE STUDENT that attend his class and that student was me :D thats how screwed up engin tutorials are. haha.

and anyway, the weather has been quite unpromising these few days, my nose is getting runny and PLUSPLUS with my lack of sleep, my immune system should be quite compromised now, well, i believed is the same with everyone else, so, please, people who read! stay healthy (: better be safe than sorry. and beware of the rhinovirus, its common during this kind of weather. flu juus too! simple but effective things:

• Wash your hand, frequently!
• Get plenty of sleep.
• Exercise, increases the body's virus-killing cells. Even better, exercise outside in the fresh air, away from dehydrating indoor heating systems and recirculated, germy air.
• Eat healthy foods with lots of vitamins, like colorful fruits and vegetables, whole grains and yogurt.
• Drink fluids; it flushes out your system.
• Take care of yourself!

seeya next post :P (hopefully not so soon)

whats karma.

Karma (Sanskrit: कर्म kárma (help·info), kárman- "act, action, performance"[1]; Pali: kamma) is the concept of "action" or "deed" in Indian religions understood as that which causes the entire cycle of cause and effect (i.e., the cycle called saṃsāra) originating in ancient India and treated in Hindu, Jain, Sikh and Buddhist philosophies.

thats from wiki, of course. talking about karma, cause and effect happen in our everyday life. call it coincidence or just pure luck or maybe 'un'luck, i still believe that there is such thing as karma. what you seed is what you get. strangely, we always talk about karma in the 'negative' sense, well, as humans you only complain and remember bad things that happen to you. we take the positive things that occur to us for granted. heh, or perhaps karma just happen in the negative sense.

well, for me, it really happens to me everytime i did something bad to others :\ haha, it doesnt sound nice, no. but yeah it happens. (and i kinda dont want to elaborate here :p) more than enough to remind me to treat people better. if you dont want to be treated like that, dont treat other people in that way. well, be nice. (:

enough of that (: yeah, slept at like 7am yesterday, and woke up at 5pm -.- WELL, just see how screwed up my body clock is. (even worse, yt slept at 7am and woke up at 10pm, shes just screwed o.O HAHAHAHA), ok. my plan for correcting my body clock starts today! heres the plan!
1.not sleeping tonight!(saturday night)
2.sleep early on sunday night!
3.monday maximum 4am
4.tuesday, wednesday maximum 3am
5.thursday-onwards maximum 2am
HEH, thats the plan :D i hope i can keep on it! (at least until exam is done) hehe, a goodnight sleep is a necessity for a fresh brain :D

oh by the way yesterday was movie marathon! (haha and thats why i slept at 7am XD)

Started with X-men origins - Wolverine something. aahaha, the quality was workprint quality. alot of the special effects hasnt been put in, so its kinda funny watching the rope and the dummy! hahaha, but as usual its still dvd quality (i refuse to watch any quality lower than R5 or dvdscr) hahaha. next was P.s i love you, not bad, but not so nice either. then joce comes and we watched changeling! altho this kinda draggy movie is the one i dont like, well angelina jolie acted really professionally and yeah the movie was good! hehe, then the final movie we watched is butterfly effect 3 - revelation. NICE, heh like other butterfly effect series the concept is still the same, this sequal, although not as nice as the original first butterfly effect, but definitely much better than the 2nd one.

the feeling is damn SHIOK after a movie marathon, i really cant wait for the next one. if theres a movie marathon in the cinema, really count me in! :D :D :D :D :D

today was supposed to be tennis day at NTU! the first time yh,mx and ivan coming to NTU to tennis BUT was raining LIKE SHIT. damn. haha, so in the end met them at JP for dinner and arcade. well, the rich mingxuan who just got his bonus treated us to newyorknewyork! heh heh, free NICE dinner :D really talked alot about people we know. haha, gossips of course too. we played jubox or jucube i forgot what it is. haha, the 4x4 music thingy in arcade that one, seriously quite fun! (: and guess what, tennis day is shifted to sunday! and its like 4 more hours to tennis at yihong's place as usual. haha, im not gonna sleep, gonna get back to my maths notes again after this and go tennis straight :P then i gonna mug at KAP till church, ANYONE FREE ACCOMPANY ME MUG AT KAP TMR, URGENT. hahahaha. ok

this has been quite a long post, and just to tell itchy hands people that theres nothing hidden in this post (unlike the posts before if you notice :p) because its long and if you're itchy to find, itll really take quite some time. hahaha. nothing. nothing. and thats it for today!

blackholes and revelations,
our hopes and expectations. i gotta live up to their, to my expectation.
no,im gonna be even better, come back, the past me.

found my way back..

tho you most probably wont read this, but i wanna say sorry to take your kindness for granted, yet again. SORRY, though im sure i can't count how many sorry's ive said, but i mean it. and thank you (:

talking 'bout taking something for granted, well, i can say im guilty of many. it has always been my weakness, one that i cant wait to get rid of. if people say what you do defines who you are, well then im gonna change the way i are. no more, no more. who i were costs me alot of regrets in my life. some of the most painful ones too.

but looking from a different perspective, it will still be me, a better me (or at least i hope..)

at the bright side, im happy that there are still people that really care about me for what i am (: im happy that things are turning for the better everyday. hah, shall not take things for granted anymore and give thanks for everything that i have. i dont want anymore regrets (:

went to run again yesterday with my long lost running partner :D heh, finally you come back to run with me :D hahahaha.. you mug hard and hurry up get your car, haha, keep saying want this want that but noooothinggg yet :\ hurry hurry and remember not to pangseh the next class outing! haha.. pangseh-kia.. holiday plans dont pangseh too!

and this is to my emo friend, wenhao.

okay the comic strip is just random,
but here is a piece of advice i picked up along the road. from evonne's blog,
1st, learn to accept it.
2nd, learn to face it.
3rd, learn to let go of it.
well i dont know where are you now, but when you decide to let go,
dont look back.

and getting back to the post title, yep finally found my way back.and not looking back

disclaimer: to any of you who managed to get to this writing, dont worry bout me, im fine (: and i dont blame anyone in anyway possible. im just writing my mind out and im sorry if by doing this i offended anyone.

when people say that its better that you dont know. well, i think you're wrong. im feeling much better now, much much better since i know what is real. (: to keep someone in the dark but letting the person know that you are keeping him in the dark. im just saying. well, if you know me well, you know ill find my way through, always.

and you know what, im strong, i've faced rougher times, this is nothing. its my fault to be in this kinda position in the first place. its my fault. it hurts, but it heals (: the only thing thats left is the scar, well, its is not in my feeling, but in the relationship of the party involved. im sure it will never be the same anymore.

though i very much hope that you, and me, can get back to our normal relationship, i know it wont be the same anymore. i dont blame you for anything really. i just hope its back to normal, ill never want to lose a friend like you.

in the first place its my fault to get my judgement clouded by others opinions, fall to a trap where i shouldnt have fallen into. get myself into unnecessary trouble and hurt. sigh, i shouldnt have been so stupid to listen. well, you know that you know better than the rest. why dont trust yourself. my fault.

the way you do. i dont expect anything like that after anything like this. (well its incomprehensible but its just like that) heh, well you can never be as sure as hell anyway, cos you dont even know me that well. its just me to be like that, to treat people like that. seriously dont get my intentions wrong. i havent even started. and i never gonna start. sounds like im contradicting myself. (:

well maybe its best to end like this, and to let me know in this way. maybe you (this is a different you) already know that ill find out this way and you think its best for me and everyone, well you're right. (if you do really think like this, ah u really know me well), thank you.

im fine, im alright, im better than any (: nothing will bring me down.

lastly, thank you, and no, not goodbye (: